Arkhaven logo

54 Hit the Road panel 1
54 Hit the Road panel 2

Episode 54: Hit the Road

"The President has declared a national week of mourning to honor the late Senator Castillo who died suddenly last night while asking us to ‘end the hate,’” the reporter began. “Her body will lie in state at the Capitol rotunda beginning…”

“Yo, what’s up zoomers? It’s ya’ boy, Zoomcaster, here.” He stood in awe, overwhelmed by the events he’d witnessed. “It was like… it was like…” he struggled to describe what he’d seen. “It was like God just cut her down. ‘Died suddenly,’ everyone’s saying. ‘Died suddenly.’ There’s been an awful lot of ‘died suddenly’ lately. Even when we had COVID all over the place, we didn’t have seemingly healthy people just dropping dead like that. It’s sus, if you ask me. It’s mighty sus. She SAID she got boosted. Then moments later, THIS happens. You can’t tell me there isn’t a connection.”

“You’re watching the number one conservative videocast in the entire universe,” began another young man. “Many amateur pundits are rushing to claim that Senator Castillo’s recent COVID booster may have played some role in her sudden death. That’s just a conspiracy theory, folks. Talk about trying to plot a curve through too few points. Correlation and coincidence are NOT evidence of causation. Facts and logic, folks. Facts and logic.”

umanity’s devastating impact and reset our society, so it won’t happen again.”

54 Hit the Road panel 4

“Scientists tell us that climate change may be the cause of the alarming number of sudden deaths we’ve experienced lately in otherwise healthy people,” the British reporter opined. “Extreme heat can cause clotting and sudden heart attacks. That’s why we’ll be jetting to Hawaii next week for the Global Climate Summit where the world’s movers and shakers will learn from our most brilliant minds, figure out how we can reduce, recycle, and reuse, how we can reclaim our planet from humanity’s devastating impact and reset our society, so it won’t happen again.”

54 Hit the Road panel 6

“By the end of the week-long trial,” the gray-haired reporter wrote an obituary, “she was a walking malignancy. Her eyes fascinated me: I watched them all day long. They were blazing points of hatred. What was behind that consuming hatred?

“Men. Men of integrity and competency and power and decency like Travis who destroyed her and made a mockery of her; now she would lead feminists, her soy boy feminist allies, and the gender-confused against them. Various facts clicked into the theory, and I hold it still. The hatred in her eyes was not for the enemies of social justice; it was for the enemies of Castillo.

“But what of her life? Did she accomplish any useful thing? Was she, in her day, of any dignity as a woman, and of any value to her fellow citizens? I doubt it. Castillo, at her best, was simply a magnificent jobseeker. The issues that she bawled about usually meant nothing to her. In her last great battle for chemical castration and gender-mutilating surgery for minors, there was only a ridiculous malignancy.

“Castillo was a vulgar and common woman. She was ignorant, bigoted, self-seeking, blatant, and dishonest. Her career brought her into contact with the leading figures of her time; she preferred the company of gender hucksters like President Buchmann. It was hard to believe, watching her at trial, that she had prowled the halls of power, traveled, been received in civilized societies, that she had been a high officer of state. She seemed only a poor clod like those around her, deluded by a childish ideology, full of an almost pathological hatred of all learning, all human dignity, all beauty, all fine and noble things, and all masculinity. She was a peasant come home to the dung-pile. Imagine a lady, and you have imagined everything that she was not.

“The job before democracy is to get rid of such canaille. If it fails, they will devour it.” The gray-haired reporter filed his obituary, shut his laptop, and left town.

“We have lost a great-souled woman and champion for social justice,” another reporter declared. “Our entire nation mourns for this tragic martyr who died as she lived – fighting the good fight to ‘end the hate.’ Our champion has fallen; the fight goes on.”

“This morning, I’M the one who needs an inspiration inhalation,” began a balding man, “deep breath in… hold it… and out. The Great Analyzer here with a public service fact check. Senator Castillo is the latest victim of anti-vaccination conspiracy theorists who claim she succumbed to ‘vaccine sudden death.’ In reality, the experts all agree that the scientific evidence to date clearly shows that the benefits of COVID vaccines outweigh their risks. Am I right? Of course, I am. Let me explain.”

54 Hit the Road panel 8

“You can only have a heart attack if you have a heart,” another reporter emoted, “and Senator Castillo surely had a big heart.”

“Well, I’m not sure it’s polite to be talking about enlarged hearts and any other side effects of booster-induced myocarditis at a time like this,” the Dangerous Tranny declared. “We can’t be SURE it was the COVID vax,” he flipped his rainbow-hued feather stole past his MAGA hat to emphasize his point, “but it WAS the COVID vax. Obviously.”

54 Hit the Road panel 10
54 Hit the Road panel 11
54 Hit the Road panel 12
The Wise of Heart series cover
54 Hit the Road episode cover
34K views1.4K likes
75 comments

The Wise of Heart

Created by
author avatar
Aetherczar
He wanted to test the new Gender Awareness in Academia (GAIA) Act, but high-school biology teacher, Mike Andrews, got more than he bargained for. Arrested and thrown in jail for the crime of teaching the biology of sex determination and for refusing to affirm a student’s gender identity, Mike faces a show trial amid a media circus. The Wise of Heart offers a timely tale of transgender mania as author Hans G. Schantz re-imagines and updates the story of the Scopes Monkey Trial.
57 Coda episode cover
57 CodaEpisode #57
56 A Silent Contemplation episode cover
56 A Silent ContemplationEpisode #56
55 A Final Farewell episode cover
55 A Final FarewellEpisode #55
54 Hit the Road episode cover
54 Hit the RoadEpisode #54
53 Senator Castillo’s Big Announcement episode cover
53 Senator Castillo’s Big AnnouncementEpisode #53
52 The Superintendent's Reward episode cover
52 The Superintendent's RewardEpisode #52
51 Strike the Tent episode cover
51 Strike the TentEpisode #51
50 An Unexpected Proposal episode cover
50 An Unexpected ProposalEpisode #50
49 A Premature Conclusion episode cover
49 A Premature ConclusionEpisode #49
48 A Summons for the Superintendent episode cover
48 A Summons for the SuperintendentEpisode #48
47 I Have Your Back episode cover
47 I Have Your BackEpisode #47
46 A Surprise Witness for the Defense episode cover
46 A Surprise Witness for the DefenseEpisode #46
45 A Cowboy Speeding Ticket episode cover
45 A Cowboy Speeding TicketEpisode #45
44 An Unexpected Proposition episode cover
44 An Unexpected PropositionEpisode #44
43 Trust the Spin Doctors episode cover
43 Trust the Spin DoctorsEpisode #43
42 The Aftermath episode cover
42 The AftermathEpisode #42
41 The "End-Hate" Rally episode cover
41 The "End-Hate" RallyEpisode #41
40 Acey's Reaction episode cover
40 Acey's ReactionEpisode #40
39 A Contempt Citation episode cover
39 A Contempt CitationEpisode #39
38 Castillo Cross-Examines Mike episode cover
38 Castillo Cross-Examines MikeEpisode #38
37 Mike Andrews Testifies episode cover
37 Mike Andrews TestifiesEpisode #37
36 The Judge Rules on the Defense Testimony  episode cover
36 The Judge Rules on the Defense Testimony Episode #36
35 Putting the Transphobia in the Andrews Transphobia Trial episode cover
35 Putting the Transphobia in the Andrews Transphobia TrialEpisode #35
34 Travis and Castillo Confer episode cover
34 Travis and Castillo ConferEpisode #34
33  Castillo Cross-Examines Dr. Lachman episode cover
33 Castillo Cross-Examines Dr. LachmanEpisode #33
32-Dr. Lachman Testifies episode cover
32-Dr. Lachman TestifiesEpisode #32
31-The Judge Rules on Expert Testimony episode cover
31-The Judge Rules on Expert TestimonyEpisode #31
30 An Empathetic Nudge episode cover
30 An Empathetic NudgeEpisode #30
29  A Final Appeal episode cover
29 A Final AppealEpisode #29
28 All That Nonsense episode cover
28 All That NonsenseEpisode #28
27 Senator Castillo Objects episode cover
27 Senator Castillo ObjectsEpisode #27
26 Harry Shelton Testifies episode cover
26 Harry Shelton TestifiesEpisode #26
25 Clowns and Ringmasters episode cover
25 Clowns and RingmastersEpisode #25
24 A Private Lunch episode cover
24 A Private LunchEpisode #24
23 Best Two Out of Three episode cover
23 Best Two Out of ThreeEpisode #23
22 Senator Travis Cross-Examines President Buchmann episode cover
22 Senator Travis Cross-Examines President BuchmannEpisode #22
21 President Buchmann Testifies episode cover
21 President Buchmann TestifiesEpisode #21
20 A Plethora of Propagandists episode cover
20 A Plethora of PropagandistsEpisode #20
19 An Offer He Can't Refuse episode cover
19 An Offer He Can't RefuseEpisode #19
18 A Disgruntled Superintendent episode cover
18 A Disgruntled SuperintendentEpisode #18
17 Sue Morgan Testifies episode cover
17 Sue Morgan TestifiesEpisode #17
16 The Superintendent Testifies episode cover
16 The Superintendent TestifiesEpisode #16
15 The Defense Reveals Their Case episode cover
15 The Defense Reveals Their CaseEpisode #15
14 Ruling on the Motion to Quash episode cover
14 Ruling on the Motion to QuashEpisode #14
13 An Unauthorized Disclosure episode cover
13 An Unauthorized DisclosureEpisode #13
12 Clowns & Ringmasters episode cover
12 Clowns & RingmastersEpisode #12
11 The Defense Argument episode cover
11 The Defense ArgumentEpisode #11
10 The State's Rebuttal episode cover
10 The State's RebuttalEpisode #10
09 A Motion to Quash episode cover
09 A Motion to QuashEpisode #9
08 The Show Begins episode cover
08 The Show BeginsEpisode #8
07 A Private Moment episode cover
07 A Private MomentEpisode #7
06 Jury Selection episode cover
06 Jury SelectionEpisode #6
05 You May Be Seated - The Media Circus episode cover
05 You May Be Seated - The Media CircusEpisode #5
04 Welcome to the Big Top episode cover
04 Welcome to the Big TopEpisode #4
03 Pitching the Tent episode cover
03 Pitching the TentEpisode #3
02 An Educational Misdemeanor episode cover
02 An Educational MisdemeanorEpisode #2
01 Introduction and A Conspiracy is Born episode cover
01 Introduction and A Conspiracy is BornEpisode #1
,
List icon
Comment icon
Prev icon
Next icon
Fullscreen icon